Am I Fizzling Out?

Though I always had the heart of a journalist, since 1959 I have made most of my living writing jokes. I love writing jokes.

Yes, of course, journalists have hearts!

I think the reason I love joke writing is because, growing up, I picked cotton, hauled hay, gathered corn by hand, ate dirt behind the wheel of a B-Farmall tractor, and performed all the other fun jobs at which country children excel.

I did not excel.

But I did develop a sense of humor, possibly to survive, and probably because it was such fun to come home tired and sweaty at night and listen to great radio comedians. My first favorite was Fanny Bryce as "Baby Snooks." I still can hear that silly giggle.

Red Skelton's "Junior, the Mean Little Kid" had me rolling on the bare floor of our family room under the old Waterson radio.

When you're dirty already and have only water for a Saturday night bath, rolling on the floor is okay.

I was most influenced by The Grand Ole Opry's premier comic Rod Brasfield and Tennessee Ernie Ford. The first lines I ever copied down to remember were Rod's, "His eyes bugged out like stomped on toad-frog" and Ernie's, "As nervous as a long-tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs."

That was over 60 years ago, yet today I still hear those now and then.

As a teen, I graduated to Mark Twain and Ring Lardner, both wonderfully funny writers.
In the last 40 years, alone at a keyboard, I have laughed sometimes uncontrollably at the nonsense oozing from my brain cavity. It is just so much fun to try and line up original, funny words. And it has been gratifying to know my words helped personalities at some 1,600 radio stations a month, in almost every English-speaking big city and small town on this Earth, make their listeners smile. It sure beat picking cotton.

But lately, it's not quite the fun it once was.

Lately, I feel serious words trying to ooze into the flow.

The problem, I'm afraid, is politics -- though it's probably not a serious problem.
I have written about every subject imaginable, and, when the audience is in a laughing mood, all subjects -- every single one -- needs to be approached with humor.

Particularly politics.

I consider deflating pompous politicians with humor to be a calling from God.

But for some reason, I am no longer driven to poke fun at the powerful as much as I am driven to do other things.

I blame the current presidential campaign. I have thoroughly enjoyed roasting both Republicans and Democrats when each group was in power.

I have tried always, though not always succeeded, in creating jokes and poking fun non-maliciously. This is not always easy.

But the best writers can do it.

I am tired, I think, of making fun of George W. Bush. I feel strongly the poor guy should never have been elected governor of Texas, much less President of the United States. In Texas, Bush had Lieutenant Governor Bob Bullock to keep him from falling on his face, but in Washington, he never was able to enlist such able statesmen to help.

Also, I think the current crop of presidential candidates, both Democrat and Republican, have excellent potential.

I wonder about Mike Huckabee, whose name sounds like one Mark Twain might have created.
Having been extremely close to 10 Southern Baptist pastors, and greatly admired an 11th, I can't understand why a man like Huckabee would be the least bit interested in the Presidency. Pastors are very special people, and though I know they sometimes feel led to leave that special ministry for another calling, I have difficulty understanding it.

Of course, it might be more understandable if Huckabee wanted to become a writer for Jay Leno, or some such really special calling. And Jay could really use the help right now...

Having tried for a few years now to back away from nonsense, and having failed miserably, I cannot commit completely to never writing another joke nor bit of satire. In fact, likely tomorrow I will create or regurgitate something completely dumb and stick it on my Web site.

I will try desperately to never write another joke aimed at Britney Spears or any other young person who has achieved way too much exploitation and acclaim too quickly for their own good.
And that won't be easy, but maybe it will be an improvement.

Hopefully, I am finally growing up.

Though more likely, I'm only growing old.