Scooters and iPots
Big News
President Bush has commuted the sentence of Scooter Libby so he doesn't have to go to jail. But, personally, I think there's more to it than just a Get Out of Jail Free card. Look for Libby to take over a certain ranch in Montana in the summer and another one in Texas in the winter.
- Can't help but wonder what kind of jackpot Karl Rove will wind up with.
- Maybe a library at SMU.
This just in. Apple announced today it will soon be ready with it's latest high-tech gizmo -- the iPot.
- That's right, tech-heads, it's an electronic fold-way port-a-potty with ESPN, a game port, light beer on tap, and enough memory to help you remember how to use it.
- Available soon at PlumberShack.
- The iPot -- Perfect for waiting in line for the next trendy gizmo.
- Line up!
Michael Jackson is looking for a vacation home on Maryland's eastern shore. The poor guy hasn't worked in two years -- why does he need a vacation?
- If I had been Michael's publicist, I would have had him return to California and rent a room from Paris Hilton.
- He could take care of her Chihuahua.
- Advise her on her next video.
- And as a way of giving back, force-feed Nicole Richie.
Love & Learn
Torture Survivors Find Help - An estimated 400,000 torture survivors live in the United States. What many have endured was ghastly, worse than can be imagined. "These memories do not go away," says Majur Malou, a Sudanese college student tortured for speaking out against his government. But now there's help.
In Fashion: Cool Hunting Around the World - Intrepid fashion traveler Gisele Scanlon is the author of "The Goddess Guide," a 280-page reference on how to become a fashion diva.
"Sicko" Health Care Reform - Michael Moore's new movie "Sicko" is both funny and poignant. Some of the stories of Americans caught up in the bureaucracy of the American health system are truly heart-wrenching. The insurance company bureaucrats he exposes are cruel and capricious. Unfortunately, Moore ignores the positive side of American health care altogether.
More Exercise Humor - There's nothing like doing pushups to help you relax. Like this morning, I did 25 pushups and I was completely relaxed. I fainted.
Shallow Thoughts
Just remember, if it wasn't for this great land of ours, we'd all drown.
Remember, kids, fireworks are dangerous, so don't take chances. You could end up with nothing to see with ... or hear with ... or pick your nose with...
Never trust a guy who wears clothes. You never know, he could be a nudist in disguise.
I was scuba diving and heard this ringing in my ears. It was an underwater Avon Lady.
Now today's exciting appetite suppressant. Just close your eyes, take a deep breath, and try to imagine a life-size sculpture of Rush Limbaugh -- carved from Spam.
President Bush has commuted the sentence of Scooter Libby so he doesn't have to go to jail. But, personally, I think there's more to it than just a Get Out of Jail Free card. Look for Libby to take over a certain ranch in Montana in the summer and another one in Texas in the winter.
- Can't help but wonder what kind of jackpot Karl Rove will wind up with.
- Maybe a library at SMU.
This just in. Apple announced today it will soon be ready with it's latest high-tech gizmo -- the iPot.
- That's right, tech-heads, it's an electronic fold-way port-a-potty with ESPN, a game port, light beer on tap, and enough memory to help you remember how to use it.
- Available soon at PlumberShack.
- The iPot -- Perfect for waiting in line for the next trendy gizmo.
- Line up!
Michael Jackson is looking for a vacation home on Maryland's eastern shore. The poor guy hasn't worked in two years -- why does he need a vacation?
- If I had been Michael's publicist, I would have had him return to California and rent a room from Paris Hilton.
- He could take care of her Chihuahua.
- Advise her on her next video.
- And as a way of giving back, force-feed Nicole Richie.
Love & Learn
Torture Survivors Find Help - An estimated 400,000 torture survivors live in the United States. What many have endured was ghastly, worse than can be imagined. "These memories do not go away," says Majur Malou, a Sudanese college student tortured for speaking out against his government. But now there's help.
In Fashion: Cool Hunting Around the World - Intrepid fashion traveler Gisele Scanlon is the author of "The Goddess Guide," a 280-page reference on how to become a fashion diva.
"Sicko" Health Care Reform - Michael Moore's new movie "Sicko" is both funny and poignant. Some of the stories of Americans caught up in the bureaucracy of the American health system are truly heart-wrenching. The insurance company bureaucrats he exposes are cruel and capricious. Unfortunately, Moore ignores the positive side of American health care altogether.
More Exercise Humor - There's nothing like doing pushups to help you relax. Like this morning, I did 25 pushups and I was completely relaxed. I fainted.
Shallow Thoughts
Just remember, if it wasn't for this great land of ours, we'd all drown.
Remember, kids, fireworks are dangerous, so don't take chances. You could end up with nothing to see with ... or hear with ... or pick your nose with...
Never trust a guy who wears clothes. You never know, he could be a nudist in disguise.
I was scuba diving and heard this ringing in my ears. It was an underwater Avon Lady.
Now today's exciting appetite suppressant. Just close your eyes, take a deep breath, and try to imagine a life-size sculpture of Rush Limbaugh -- carved from Spam.
posted by Joe Hickman at 2:48 PM
1 comments
