Hold Your Nose for Kraut Week!
Big News
Saddam Hussein says he's on a hunger strike. I can't stand to see anybody hungry, so I mailed him some frozen yogurt.
President Bush wants to shut down the food box program for the elderly. His aides are trying to spin the proposed cut positive. It’s part of his Trimmer Seniors initiative. (Alan Ray)
Instead of wasting taxpayers' money on a long Enron trial, why not just send Ken Lay hunting with Dick Cheney?
- Just don't give Lay a gun.
Wonderful Wednesday
Wednesday is Stop and Smell Your Compost Pile Day, a time to snort away the winter blahs and think about spring.
Feminist Susan B. Anthony, whose picture is on a U.S. dollar coin, was born on February 15th in 1820. If women really wanted her to be remembered, they should have put her picture on something men see every day, like the Susan B. Anthony TV remote.
Traditionally, this is National Kraut Week, sponsored by the kraut makers in an effort to stir up a little excitement about kraut.
- Kraut is not one of America's favorite foods. Baskin Robbins has never featured Kraut Sherbet as its Flavor of the Week.
- It's still impossible to buy artificially flavored kraut Jell-O.
- Not one Mexican restaurant serves flat tortillas piled high with krautamole.
- There is no kraut Jelly Belly.
- In other words, gang, if National Kraut Week is to succeed, you're going to have to pitch in, hold your nose, and give it all you've got.
Laugh & Learn
Winter Olympics Humor - Fun-Liners drawn from the Winter Olympics.
Et al
And now another exciting tidbit in our enormously useless series entitled, "Whale Trivia:"
- The average life span of a non-smoking male whale is 502 years. The average life span of a male human is 74 years.
- When Shamu heard this he immediately started his International Save the People Society.
You realize, of course, with hip-hop the hot sound, to be really "in" you have to wear your underwear upside-down.
- And pierce something important that no man has ever dreamed of piercing before.
Saddam Hussein says he's on a hunger strike. I can't stand to see anybody hungry, so I mailed him some frozen yogurt.
President Bush wants to shut down the food box program for the elderly. His aides are trying to spin the proposed cut positive. It’s part of his Trimmer Seniors initiative. (Alan Ray)
Instead of wasting taxpayers' money on a long Enron trial, why not just send Ken Lay hunting with Dick Cheney?
- Just don't give Lay a gun.
Wonderful Wednesday
Wednesday is Stop and Smell Your Compost Pile Day, a time to snort away the winter blahs and think about spring.
Feminist Susan B. Anthony, whose picture is on a U.S. dollar coin, was born on February 15th in 1820. If women really wanted her to be remembered, they should have put her picture on something men see every day, like the Susan B. Anthony TV remote.
Traditionally, this is National Kraut Week, sponsored by the kraut makers in an effort to stir up a little excitement about kraut.
- Kraut is not one of America's favorite foods. Baskin Robbins has never featured Kraut Sherbet as its Flavor of the Week.
- It's still impossible to buy artificially flavored kraut Jell-O.
- Not one Mexican restaurant serves flat tortillas piled high with krautamole.
- There is no kraut Jelly Belly.
- In other words, gang, if National Kraut Week is to succeed, you're going to have to pitch in, hold your nose, and give it all you've got.
Laugh & Learn
Winter Olympics Humor - Fun-Liners drawn from the Winter Olympics.
Et al
And now another exciting tidbit in our enormously useless series entitled, "Whale Trivia:"
- The average life span of a non-smoking male whale is 502 years. The average life span of a male human is 74 years.
- When Shamu heard this he immediately started his International Save the People Society.
You realize, of course, with hip-hop the hot sound, to be really "in" you have to wear your underwear upside-down.
- And pierce something important that no man has ever dreamed of piercing before.
posted by Joe Hickman at 1:46 PM
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