Pin the Tail on the Democrat!
Big News
Children worldwide will soon be offered cheap laptops with wireless network access and a hand-crank to provide electricity. This will be followed by a pandemic of carpel crank syndrome.
- Also called Crank Elbow.
- Look for a warning label that says, "Crank at your own risk!"
- In 157 different languages.
Mouse Friday
Mickey Mouse is 77 on Friday. As usual, all the Disney characters are invited to the birthday party. Except Donald Duck, who always insists on swimming in the punch bowl.
- Goofy can’t wait to play Pin the Tail on the Democrat.
Mickey's in pretty good health for a rat his age, though he may soon have surgery to remove cataracts. Mice hate cataracts.
- And, reportedly, Mickey may need a tail transplant. Which can be very expensive. Fortunately, he has that supplementary duck insurance to cover anything Raticare doesn't.
According to legend, it was on November 18, 1307, that William Tell, with a bow and arrow, shot an apple off his son's head. After it was all over, Junior's brow was dripping with perspiration. His pants were also dripping, but not with perspiration.
Turkey Tsunami
Not One Ounce: The Run Up to Thanksgiving - The turkey tsunami hits on the 3rd Thursday in November, replete with piles of potatoes, pies, sauces, stuffing, and all the rest. Eating preparations must begin now!
Today's badminton trivia question:
Where do the feathers used in making badminton birds come from?
- To make a badminton bird you need feathers from a goose, a goose from Thailand. If the feathers don't come from a Siamese goose, your bird won't fly right. Let's say, for example, the feathers come from an Oklahoma goose. In colder weather your bird will tend to fly south.
Final Rationalization
Remember, if we hadn't attacked somebody, all that defense money would have been wasted.
Upset stomachs on today's blog were soothed with Prestone-Bismol, the all new two-in-one yucky stuff that not only coats your stomach, but also keeps your intestines from freezing.
Children worldwide will soon be offered cheap laptops with wireless network access and a hand-crank to provide electricity. This will be followed by a pandemic of carpel crank syndrome.
- Also called Crank Elbow.
- Look for a warning label that says, "Crank at your own risk!"
- In 157 different languages.
Mouse Friday
Mickey Mouse is 77 on Friday. As usual, all the Disney characters are invited to the birthday party. Except Donald Duck, who always insists on swimming in the punch bowl.
- Goofy can’t wait to play Pin the Tail on the Democrat.
Mickey's in pretty good health for a rat his age, though he may soon have surgery to remove cataracts. Mice hate cataracts.
- And, reportedly, Mickey may need a tail transplant. Which can be very expensive. Fortunately, he has that supplementary duck insurance to cover anything Raticare doesn't.
According to legend, it was on November 18, 1307, that William Tell, with a bow and arrow, shot an apple off his son's head. After it was all over, Junior's brow was dripping with perspiration. His pants were also dripping, but not with perspiration.
Turkey Tsunami
Not One Ounce: The Run Up to Thanksgiving - The turkey tsunami hits on the 3rd Thursday in November, replete with piles of potatoes, pies, sauces, stuffing, and all the rest. Eating preparations must begin now!
Today's badminton trivia question:
Where do the feathers used in making badminton birds come from?
- To make a badminton bird you need feathers from a goose, a goose from Thailand. If the feathers don't come from a Siamese goose, your bird won't fly right. Let's say, for example, the feathers come from an Oklahoma goose. In colder weather your bird will tend to fly south.
Final Rationalization
Remember, if we hadn't attacked somebody, all that defense money would have been wasted.
Upset stomachs on today's blog were soothed with Prestone-Bismol, the all new two-in-one yucky stuff that not only coats your stomach, but also keeps your intestines from freezing.
posted by Joe Hickman at 1:14 PM
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