Absolutely Incredible Kids!

Big News

Saddam Hussein called on Iraqis Wednesday to stop killing each other and instead fight U.S. troops. Iraqis aren't that stupid, of course, so they'll probably go on killing each other.
- Hopefully, the ones that survive will sell us some oil.

This this in. The ACLU today filed suit claiming it is unconstitutional to use a cross to repel a public school teacher who is a vampire.

Thrilling Thursday

Thursday is Absolutely Incredible Kid Day, a day to write notes of encouragment to the incredible kids in your life

This is Buzzards Week in Hinckley, Ohio. Buzzard Sunday is the day most Hinckleyites watch the skies for the first buzzards of spring. Real buzzard lovers wave dead meat.
- Real buzzard lovers are frequently mentally weird and have been known to smoke feathers.
- The buzzards used to return to Cleveland, but they got tired of the inner city and moved to the suburbs. In Ohio, they call that "buzzard flight."

Thursday is St. Urho's Day, a special day for Finns who are jealous of the Irish for having so much fun on St. Patrick's Day.
- According to legend, St. Urho chased all the grasshoppers out of Finland and saved the grapes. Everybody celebrates by wearing purple and spiking the grape juice. If they do it right, they're much too sick to celebrate with the Irish on Friday.

Love & Learn

Pregnancy Countdown - Trapped in pregnancy land: Quirky questions pregnant women ask.

Now today's health tip for children who want their parents to stop smoking.

Kids, next time you're in the car, stick your bubble gum in the cigarette lighter.

Thoughts While Watching Basketball

I love basketball. Basketball is a game of graceful skills, like Shaq O'Neal ... squashing heads under the basket.