Wherever Children Are Exploited...
Big News
The Homeland Security Department said Tuesday communities facing greater risks will receive a bigger share of federal grants this year to counter terrorism. Re-prioritizing was made possible by a secret new federal eavesdropping program to help determine risk levels.
- It's illegal, but hey, if it gets us more money...
A new study shows cheerleading injuries have more than doubled. Mothers Against Pyramids insist all cheerleaders should wear costumes that include safety belts and airbags.
- "The boys won't care as long as their legs still show," said one Mom.
Microsoft said Tuesday it has creating another patch for a flaw that could let someone take control of another person's computer. So that's what "XP" stands for -- extra patches.
The World Aquarium in St. Louis is selling it's 2-headed albino rat snake on eBay. Bidding starts at $150,000. I suppose bidding on one head would be a waste of time...
- But this soon after Christmas my 2-headed snake budget's a little strapped.
Wild Wednesday
On January 4 in 1969 George Jones and Dolly Parton joined the Grand Ole Opry. George's breath took all the curl out of Dolly's wig.
I joke a lot about George Jones, but his "I Stopped Loving Her Today" is the best country song ever recorded.
The Sahara Desert Transit Authority switched from camels to cars on January 4 in 1924. By car you could cross the Sahara in only three days. It took nine days by camel -- and even then you really had to hump it.
On January 4 in 1976 Ontario neurologist Dr. Adrian Upton discovered human brain waves in a bowl of lime Jell-O.
- Honest.
- By attaching electrodes to the bowl, Dr. Upton discovered that Jell-O vibrations create wave activity identical to that of the human brain. Proving once and for all, that even if man did somehow evolve from monkeys, his brain probably came from General Foods.
Love & Learn
Keep Your Dog's Teeth Healthy - Keeping your dogs teeth and gums clean will eliminate "doggy breath" as well as keep your dog healthy. You probably can do it by brushing twice a week.
The Brain Droppings of George Carlin - A hippy dippy Texas disc jockey who morphed into the ultimate off-center thinker.
Thoughts While Applying an Icy-Hot Patch
When I ice skate, it looks like my ankles were made in Taiwan.
Skating backwards is easy. The hard part is doing it on purpose.
I never skate with a partner. Why hospitalize two people?
Today's blog is brought to you by Mini-Dish, the exciting all new pocket-portable miniature digital satellite TV receiver. Yes, kids, now you can have cable TV in the privacy of your own designer jeans and totally avoid embarrassing parental guidance. Look for Mini-Dish, wherever children are exploited.
The Homeland Security Department said Tuesday communities facing greater risks will receive a bigger share of federal grants this year to counter terrorism. Re-prioritizing was made possible by a secret new federal eavesdropping program to help determine risk levels.
- It's illegal, but hey, if it gets us more money...
A new study shows cheerleading injuries have more than doubled. Mothers Against Pyramids insist all cheerleaders should wear costumes that include safety belts and airbags.
- "The boys won't care as long as their legs still show," said one Mom.
Microsoft said Tuesday it has creating another patch for a flaw that could let someone take control of another person's computer. So that's what "XP" stands for -- extra patches.
The World Aquarium in St. Louis is selling it's 2-headed albino rat snake on eBay. Bidding starts at $150,000. I suppose bidding on one head would be a waste of time...
- But this soon after Christmas my 2-headed snake budget's a little strapped.
Wild Wednesday
On January 4 in 1969 George Jones and Dolly Parton joined the Grand Ole Opry. George's breath took all the curl out of Dolly's wig.
I joke a lot about George Jones, but his "I Stopped Loving Her Today" is the best country song ever recorded.
The Sahara Desert Transit Authority switched from camels to cars on January 4 in 1924. By car you could cross the Sahara in only three days. It took nine days by camel -- and even then you really had to hump it.
On January 4 in 1976 Ontario neurologist Dr. Adrian Upton discovered human brain waves in a bowl of lime Jell-O.
- Honest.
- By attaching electrodes to the bowl, Dr. Upton discovered that Jell-O vibrations create wave activity identical to that of the human brain. Proving once and for all, that even if man did somehow evolve from monkeys, his brain probably came from General Foods.
Love & Learn
Keep Your Dog's Teeth Healthy - Keeping your dogs teeth and gums clean will eliminate "doggy breath" as well as keep your dog healthy. You probably can do it by brushing twice a week.
The Brain Droppings of George Carlin - A hippy dippy Texas disc jockey who morphed into the ultimate off-center thinker.
Thoughts While Applying an Icy-Hot Patch
When I ice skate, it looks like my ankles were made in Taiwan.
Skating backwards is easy. The hard part is doing it on purpose.
I never skate with a partner. Why hospitalize two people?
Today's blog is brought to you by Mini-Dish, the exciting all new pocket-portable miniature digital satellite TV receiver. Yes, kids, now you can have cable TV in the privacy of your own designer jeans and totally avoid embarrassing parental guidance. Look for Mini-Dish, wherever children are exploited.
posted by Joe Hickman at 12:38 PM
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