Who Has Retarded Taste Buds?
Big News
Anheuser-Busch may go into the liquor business. Beer sales are declining for several reasons:
- Even drunks admit all beer tastes absolutely awful.
- It's simply too hard to drive, drink and talk on a cell phone at the same time.
- Most serious beer drinkers have already been killed in car wrecks.
- The average idiot isn't half as stupid as the idiots in all those TV beer commercials.
- For only a couple bucks more you can have a latte at Starbucks -- and keep it down.
June 23rd
The typewriter was patented on June 23rd in 1868. It’s not used much these days — because it doesn’t have a mouse.
New Jersey was chartered on June 23rd in 1664. In America the Spaniards already had taken the gold, and the French had taken the furs, so the British took New Jersey.
- Later, after opening casinos, New Jersey took everybody.
Some 120,000 ditch diggers revolted in Paris on June 23rd in 1848. This is an exciting story of government in action, so pay attention.
- To ease unemployment in Paris, the French government created 120,000 ditch digging jobs. Unfortunately, they didn't realize how many ditches 120,000 ditch diggers could dig. And pretty soon Paris was running over with ditches.
- So they fired the ditch diggers, and the ditch diggers revolted. Over 1,000 ditch diggers were killed, 10,000 wounded, 11,000 were deported, and the rest got new jobs filling up the ditches.
The U.S. Secret Service was born on June 23rd in 1860. The Secret Service protects the President from the people. Unfortunately, there is no organization that protects the people from the President.
Love & Learn
Energy Crisis: Too Pooped to Pop - Today's hectic lifestyles with the stresses of job and home, eating on the run, and lack of healthy exercise drain our energy faster than a Hummer gobbles gas. Here's what to do about it.
Financial Update - Frustrated with U.S. embryonic stem cell research policy, top government scientist moves to private sector.
TV Closeup: Louis C.K. - Stand-up comedian-actor-director-filmmaker Louis C.K. plays Louis, a part-time auto mechanic, in the TV sitcom “Lucky Louie.”
Dumb Stuff
You know it's hot when your underarms start whistling.
You know it's going to be a hot summer when you notice the gophers putting in a pool.
Anheuser-Busch may go into the liquor business. Beer sales are declining for several reasons:
- Even drunks admit all beer tastes absolutely awful.
- It's simply too hard to drive, drink and talk on a cell phone at the same time.
- Most serious beer drinkers have already been killed in car wrecks.
- The average idiot isn't half as stupid as the idiots in all those TV beer commercials.
- For only a couple bucks more you can have a latte at Starbucks -- and keep it down.
June 23rd
The typewriter was patented on June 23rd in 1868. It’s not used much these days — because it doesn’t have a mouse.
New Jersey was chartered on June 23rd in 1664. In America the Spaniards already had taken the gold, and the French had taken the furs, so the British took New Jersey.
- Later, after opening casinos, New Jersey took everybody.
Some 120,000 ditch diggers revolted in Paris on June 23rd in 1848. This is an exciting story of government in action, so pay attention.
- To ease unemployment in Paris, the French government created 120,000 ditch digging jobs. Unfortunately, they didn't realize how many ditches 120,000 ditch diggers could dig. And pretty soon Paris was running over with ditches.
- So they fired the ditch diggers, and the ditch diggers revolted. Over 1,000 ditch diggers were killed, 10,000 wounded, 11,000 were deported, and the rest got new jobs filling up the ditches.
The U.S. Secret Service was born on June 23rd in 1860. The Secret Service protects the President from the people. Unfortunately, there is no organization that protects the people from the President.
Love & Learn
Energy Crisis: Too Pooped to Pop - Today's hectic lifestyles with the stresses of job and home, eating on the run, and lack of healthy exercise drain our energy faster than a Hummer gobbles gas. Here's what to do about it.
Financial Update - Frustrated with U.S. embryonic stem cell research policy, top government scientist moves to private sector.
TV Closeup: Louis C.K. - Stand-up comedian-actor-director-filmmaker Louis C.K. plays Louis, a part-time auto mechanic, in the TV sitcom “Lucky Louie.”
Dumb Stuff
You know it's hot when your underarms start whistling.
You know it's going to be a hot summer when you notice the gophers putting in a pool.
posted by Joe Hickman at 2:20 PM
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