Warning! For Cynics Only
Big News
An armed man ran through the hallways of the U.S. Capitol Monday in the worst security breach in two years. Republicans weren't worried, however, since they knew guns don't kill politicians, pollsters kill politicians.
- In fact, police rushed the guy away from Congress quickly before somebody sold him some more guns.
President Bush on Monday linked his push for world democracy with first lady Laura Bush's call for governments to embrace literacy programs to improve lives. As a goodwill gesture, the President offered to read "My Pet Goat" to any Islamic fascists who will shut up and listen.
September 19th Now & Then
This is National Dog Week, a time to honor dogs everywhere. But remember, though they appreciate being honored, most dogs don't like being licked in the face.
The Panic of 1873 began on this day in 1873. Not to be confused with the Panic of 1929, which didn't begin until 1929.
- Otherwise, they were a lot alike. Banks failed, everybody went bankrupt. Oddly enough, the Panic of 1873 didn't affect car sales at all.
Farm Safety Fun Liners for National Farm Safety Week, which this is.
Mickey Mouse was born on this day in 1928, appearing in the Disney cartoon "Steamboat Willie." Mickey has worked long and hard for over 70 years, and he's not about to retire. In fact, he seems to enjoy the rat race.
The first U.S. advertisement for false teeth appeared in Boston on this date in 1768. In those days false teeth were very expensive, and most families could afford only one set. Meals took forever while everybody waited his turn to chew.
Love & Learn
Study: Overweight Infants Tend to Keep Fat On - Parents and pediatricians have one less excuse to shrug off children's extra pounds as just baby fat that kids will eventually outgrow.
Editorial: Lessons from the Pump - There are lessons to be learned from a year of soaring gas prices, but there is a very real danger that, once again, we'll learn the wrong one.
Today's Scene: College - Today's students are riding a new wave of technology.
Project of the Week: Lawyer's Bookcase - Making a case for books
There's a Mesage in Raitt's Music - Singer Bonnie Raitt says musicians have a duty to raise public awareness. On tour she donates prime seats to benefit Voter Action, a group that works to make sure U.S. elections are honest.
Today's medical tip:
Always check the parking lot at your doctor's office. If there's a Roll Royce in his parking space, you KNOW who's going to pay for it.
Shallow Thoughts
Remember, before beginning an exercise program, check with your doctor -- to make sure your heart is strong enough to take the shock of the price of exercise equipment.
This just in. Major-league club owners today announced that beginning next year the 7th inning stretch will be an hour long -- so fans can go home and get more money.
An armed man ran through the hallways of the U.S. Capitol Monday in the worst security breach in two years. Republicans weren't worried, however, since they knew guns don't kill politicians, pollsters kill politicians.
- In fact, police rushed the guy away from Congress quickly before somebody sold him some more guns.
President Bush on Monday linked his push for world democracy with first lady Laura Bush's call for governments to embrace literacy programs to improve lives. As a goodwill gesture, the President offered to read "My Pet Goat" to any Islamic fascists who will shut up and listen.
September 19th Now & Then
This is National Dog Week, a time to honor dogs everywhere. But remember, though they appreciate being honored, most dogs don't like being licked in the face.
The Panic of 1873 began on this day in 1873. Not to be confused with the Panic of 1929, which didn't begin until 1929.
- Otherwise, they were a lot alike. Banks failed, everybody went bankrupt. Oddly enough, the Panic of 1873 didn't affect car sales at all.
Farm Safety Fun Liners for National Farm Safety Week, which this is.
Mickey Mouse was born on this day in 1928, appearing in the Disney cartoon "Steamboat Willie." Mickey has worked long and hard for over 70 years, and he's not about to retire. In fact, he seems to enjoy the rat race.
The first U.S. advertisement for false teeth appeared in Boston on this date in 1768. In those days false teeth were very expensive, and most families could afford only one set. Meals took forever while everybody waited his turn to chew.
Love & Learn
Study: Overweight Infants Tend to Keep Fat On - Parents and pediatricians have one less excuse to shrug off children's extra pounds as just baby fat that kids will eventually outgrow.
Editorial: Lessons from the Pump - There are lessons to be learned from a year of soaring gas prices, but there is a very real danger that, once again, we'll learn the wrong one.
Today's Scene: College - Today's students are riding a new wave of technology.
Project of the Week: Lawyer's Bookcase - Making a case for books
There's a Mesage in Raitt's Music - Singer Bonnie Raitt says musicians have a duty to raise public awareness. On tour she donates prime seats to benefit Voter Action, a group that works to make sure U.S. elections are honest.
Today's medical tip:
Always check the parking lot at your doctor's office. If there's a Roll Royce in his parking space, you KNOW who's going to pay for it.
Shallow Thoughts
Remember, before beginning an exercise program, check with your doctor -- to make sure your heart is strong enough to take the shock of the price of exercise equipment.
This just in. Major-league club owners today announced that beginning next year the 7th inning stretch will be an hour long -- so fans can go home and get more money.
posted by Joe Hickman at 2:47 PM
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